Procrastination: it saves lives

I was at work this afternoon and didn't have much going on, so I was gmail-chatting with my friend Dawn. At 2:30 she signed off to go to a meeting and I logged out to go pump for Nico. Before I could get up from my chair, a page went out over the PA system telling everyone to evacuate the building. Figuring it was a badly-timed drill, I called down to the receptionist to ask what the hell was up and he told me there was a gas leak. We're all going to die! (Okay, he didn't say that second part.) I was supposed to pump for Nico and then leave at 3:00 in order to run home and change and then head out to our work booth at the county fair, so I didn't figure I had time to wait on the gas company to show up and suss out the problem. Last time there was an alleged gas leak, we all stood around in the parking lot for 45 minutes and then went back inside. I threw all my pump stuff into my bag, grabbed my purse, and hoofed it, and as soon as I opened my office door, I could smell gas. That office door must be a veritable airlock, because the whole floor and stairwell reeked of gas. I realized that I'd been feeling a bit off for about half an hour, but I had blamed it on not having enough to eat for lunch, not being slowly poisoned at my desk.

I told my coworkers I had to go so they wouldn't think I was trapped inside somewhere when I wasn't standing around outside with everyone else and trotted off to my car. As I was driving away, the firetruck showed up, and that's when I realized what totally would've happened if I hadn't been wasting time talking to Dawn today. If I'd hustled up and gone to pump on time, I would have been in the back room when the evacuation announcement was made, and I can't hear the PA at all back there. I would've just gotten started when the firetruck arrived, which means that either one of my coworkers or one of the firefighters would presumably have burst in to warn me about our impending doom, only to catch me with my boobs out. And as much as "firefighter walks in on busty chick using breast pump" sounds like the setup of a really specific porno, in real life it would've been less porn and more most embarrassing moment of my entire life, including the time I was buzzed by a low-flying aircraft while peeing behind a bush. Thank God for gmail chat, seriously.