You ain't got no alibi...2005.10.01

This is part two of my ugly car blogging fascination.

The 2005 Mustang



Let's start with a car that's not really that ugly, just to prove I'm not totally mean. The first few times I saw the 2005 Mustangs, I was appalled. I just could not see the appeal of melding new-Mustang-style curvy fenders with old-Mustang-style front and back ends. But the more I saw them, the more I liked them.

Now I can appreciate that they are pretty attractive--though nowhere near as sexy as the old school Mustangs...that kind of goes without saying. Still, for some reason when I look at one face-on, it makes me think of a puppy dog. Go figure.


The Dodge Magnum



This is the car that inspired my fascination with writing some blog entries about ugly cars. K.W. rented one for a trip, and the car ended up being dubbed "The Big American Penis." Previously, I had argued that only James Bond could pull off driving this car. Anyone else would just look ridiculous. This is a truly hideous car. It's so bulbous...like a station wagon without the quirky charm...like a sedan in need of rhinoplasty...like a...well, like a Big American Penis. There's really no other way to describe it.

Postscript: Laura Danger says, "The Dodge Magnum...giving soccer dads their balls back."


The Scion xB





This is the only vehicle on the planet that makes the Honda Element look a little less heinous. I appreciate the ecological significance of the Scion. I dream of one day owning a hybrid, but in my dreams hybrid cars look more like normal cars. They certainly don't look like the Element's homelier sister. There are 3 models of Scion, and I'll admit I chose the ugliest one to poke fun at, but then again, that's kind of the point.


Here's the Toyota Prius:



This is not an overly attractive car, either, but it's a lot better than the previous example. If you squint a little, you can almost imagine that the Prius is a space-age Volkswagen Beetle. Almost.