Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Love is a happy time all throughout the Universe.


It's when a male part of the species goes to the female part of the species and says, "Hey, do you wanna go on a date?" And then she would say, "Why, yes, I'd like to go on a date," if you're lucky. And then, they'd go to a restaurant, and she gets something called a salad, and then he gets a big piece of beef that he eats.

Love is also when the female part of the species says, "Hey, look...the phones are havin' fun!" and the male part of the species says back, "Ha! Phone sex!" Because you were thinking it, he was just saying it.



And then it's him flipping one phone around and saying, "Call this one 'Star 69'" after you take a picture of the first staged piece of phone porn.




Love is also a ginormous mug of hot chocolate, made because I had to stay up late writing my freaking Kafka paper and I was cold. MB makes the best cocoa in the whole world. He calls it "cool cocoa," not because it's chilled, but because it is the shiz-nite (as he might say, though thankfully not often). Apparently he makes it the way his mom makes it. All I know is that it involves a little bit of milk added to the Swiss Miss and water, and also that it is the best damn cocoa EVER. Better than Starbucks. Better than at my favorite local coffee and donut shop. I could be cheesy and say it's the love that makes it good, but I'll tell the truth:  as with all of MB's recipes, it's the cruelty, malice, and will to dominate all life*  that make the difference.


(Note also the stack of books waiting to be reviewed on badgerbooks & the fact that I'm only on page 2 of my 9 page paper even though it's already 8:32 PM.)



Love is also apparently taking me seriously when, while in the throes of paper woe, I whine at 8:30 or 9:00 PM that I really want a box of Dots (P.S. the Tropical ones are NASTY.), to the point of turning it into some kind of gelatinous Grail quest the next day.

I called MB around 3:20 this afternoon with a question, knowing he'd been off work for 20 minutes and figuring he'd be home. He was at the grocery store, looking for Dots. I thanked him for his devotion, but told him not to worry about it, since I knew that particular store stopped stocking Dots a few months ago (bastards).

He called me back around 3:50, from a different grocery store, still bereft of Dots. I told him, seriously, don't worry about the Dots.

Not one to give up a gelatinous Grail quest, MB persevered. He called me back at 4:30. Five stores down the line, he'd scored a stash. SWEET.



I think I'll keep him.

And that, to me, ladies and gentlemen... is love. Kinda makes you cry, doesn't it? --Brak


Reading: Y: the Last Man

Playing: Lemon Parade by Tonic, No Angel by Dido, Bringing Down the Horse by The Wallflowers, Book of Secrets by Loreena McKennitt


P.S. I can hear the cat snoring somewhere in the room. I wish I could record and post the sound, because it is HILARIOUS.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:08 AM

    All Hail Brak!

    But whats with the Dots fetish? They taste okay, but man, do they stick to my teeth. . .

    :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. They're SO GOOD. And if you sort of lightly chew them / gum them instead of just chomping down, they don't stick very much.

    ReplyDelete