I realized the other day it's been over a year since I started going to cardio boot camp class at the gym. Turns out it really is like a bad boyfriend, only these days it doesn't so much make me feel like crap. I'm still the heaviest and the slowest in the class, but have come to terms with the fact that it'll always be that way when I'm in class with girls who go to the gym five days a week or do hardcore boxing training. I'm admittedly a little disappointed that I never lost weight (or fat, or a size, or inches off my ass, in case you're about to hop to the comments to tell me that muscle weighs more than fat), but I'm admittedly also crap at watching calories or skipping dessert or any of that other stuff. Also, I'm realizing that at my age, metabolism, and body's preferences, it's going to take more than one hour of hard work a week to make any difference. I am currently of the mind that I'll cross that bridge after I have the next baby, since it would really piss me off to eat salads every day to lose weight and then get pregnant and pack it all back on again. Probably I'm just putting it off with lame excuses, but I can live with that for a while longer.
I did get down to my pre-Nico weight for a few glorious months, but now I'm back to a stubborn three pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight, which was already a bit too much. But! Under all the padding, I'm really getting stronger. I guess it was August or so when I realized that even though cardio class was still hard, it was no longer holy-shit-hard. I added a fourth riser to my stepper and started grabbing heavier weights and shocked myself by being able to handle it. So it's hard, but I only feel like barfing if I eat too much before class. I'm usually sore the next two days, but in that rewarding I-earned-it way that isn't so bad. My abs are still kind of shot thanks to Nico's speedy sunroof exit, but they're much stronger than I ever thought they would be again. And I was shocked to catch a glimpse of my upper back in the mirror after a shower the other day and see that it actually looked … really good. If only I could magically find a formal event to attend wearing a strapless ball gown to hide everything from mid-back down.
Anyway, I'm sure none of you were on the edge of your seats wondering about the state of my cardiovascular health, but if any of you are thinking about trying a cardio bootcamp class, I encourage you to give it a shot. And if you already have and feel like it's too hard and you'll never make it, maybe you really will, if you just hang in there for a bit.