I learned a long time ago not to ask why
Noise from the kitchen: *thud* ... *thud* ... *thud thud thud*
vbg: What are you doing?
MB: The dog's hitting the dishwasher with his tail.
dog: *stands in kitchen doorway, tail facing out, watching MB*
vbg: Uh, no he's not. I'm looking right at him.
vbg: So what were you really doing?
MB: Pretending to be the dog hitting the dishwasher with his tail.