Mostly house-y stuff

An old friend gave Nico a really amazing gift this past weekend:

She created this freehand after receiving a bag of colorful scraps that reminded her of the wings of the butterfly from The Very Hungry Caterpillar. (I keep telling her she needs to start an Etsy shop, because this is just one of the many amazing things she's made.) I posted an admiring comment on an early in-progress facebook picture, and she later surprised me by deciding to give it to Nico upon completion. Since Nico doesn't use blankets yet (and won't even tolerate a sheet across his feet when he's in my bed) and since, hello, this thing is AMAZING, I think I'm going to hang it on the wall above his crib. Does anyone have any tips on hanging a quilt as art? It's pretty small as quilts go, only 37" across the top. Some cursory googling indicates that I should probably stitch a pocket onto the back to slide a dowel through, and then use the dowel as support for the hanging mechanism. My friend Rachel suggested using a hollow rod so that I can run a ribbon or invisible nylon line through the center and have the rod completely hidden behind the quilt. Would a piece of small-diameter PVC pipe work? I love this idea because it wouldn't require a lot of hardware on the wall, and because if Nico wants to use it as a blanket someday, it'll be simple to remove the pocket.

Advise me (again), internets

MB and I have been talking a bit lately about what room we want to redo next, on the hypothetical future day when we have a little bit of money set aside. I think we're going to address the living room first since our current couch has a spot the size of a loaf of bread where the upholstery has worn through to the stuffing, but I've also been daydreaming about redoing our little half bath off the kitchen. It's got the fantastic original 1940 tile and sink, which we aren't going to touch, but the wallpaper with pastel blue seashells must go. So what color would you paint a very small bathroom tiled in white, black, and a very light gray? What curtains would you put in there after painting?

Here's the best photo I have of the tile, since I'm too lazy to go take and upload a new one at the moment...the tiles are pretty small:

Gamechanger

I can't remember who, but one of my facebook friends posted a video the other day with a tutorial on how to fold a fitted sheet so it doesn't look like a big wadded-up ball. I tried it tonight, and damned if it didn't work like a charm. I love that the first comment under the video is "Shit...he's already married."

Braggy McBraggerson

Nico "reading" a picture book:

And now, bedtime!


Reading:  The Mermaid Garden by Santa Montefiore (Yes, still, OMG.)

Playing:  Sublime

Merry Christmas Eve!

7 - 8 - 9

I hate to do two video posts in a row, but I have been thinking of this song all day:



It's from the Barenaked Ladies' decidedly non-lame children's album, Snack Time.

As a bonus, my favorite track from the album (which I suspect I'll buy for the brachiopod someday):

Hee!

There is now a sequel to my most favorite internet video ever:




Reading:  Darwin Slept Here:  Discovery, Adventure, and Swimming Iguanas in Charles Darwin's South America by Eric Simons

Playing:  my Pearl Jam station on Pandora

Placeholder

I'm working on a long post with pictures and interesting stuff like that, but it's taking forever to finish, so here's something that I find endlessly amusing (though the tune does get stuck in my head something fierce. Sorry about that.):



Bum buh buh buh bum. Dee dee-dee-dee!

Triple threat

I am not exaggerating at all when I say this one made me laugh until I had tears running down my face and a stomachache:

Not dead!

Concert was FABULOUS. Hope to write about it soon.

Have read three good books in a row, over the course of about a week and a half. Life is busy. House is a mess. Pets constantly acting like toddlers in fur coats. Warring toddlers, at that.

Will try very hard to come up with something interesting to say later today. Until then, please enjoy this video from my hilarious friend basscomm:

"Plant Psychology"



Reading:  Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman

Playing:  Pearl Jam Radio on Pandora

lolkitters of the week

Click the photo to vote for Kitters!

View the collected weekly lolkitters on Flickr.


Bonus hilarious cat video:



Bonus bonus about the cat video:

One of the funniest videos I've seen on the internet in a while

An engineers' guide to cats:

Hello, Jesus. I'm a cat.

I had a fun post planned about the rockin' date I had last night, but my body had other plans. I think I have a tiny fever, and I sorta feel like ass, so here's a cat video that made me laugh like a loon in my office yesterday:

Dear drive-thru workers of the world,

I always go out of my way to be polite to you, because for five years, I was one of you. I know firsthand what a craptacular, thankless job yours can be. Because of this, I am willing to forgive just about anything. If the fries are cold, I eat them anyway. If there's a tomato on my sandwich even though I asked for lettuce only, I'm willing to pull the tomato off and eat the sandwich. If you forget something from our order, I'm the one defending you while MB is pointing out that getting an order right is not that hard.

But there is one issue on which I must take a stand, one thing that annoys me so much that I can no longer remain silent. When you hand me a cup with soda running down the side, that pisses me off. It would take you mere seconds to wipe off the sides of the cup. If I get Pepsi on the upholstery of the car I'm driving now, I will NEVER hear the end of it. When I worked the drive-thru, I always took a few seconds to clean off the cup if I slopped the soda over the edge. Please, PLEASE do the same for me. I know you're in a hurry. I know you don't get paid enough. I know that the majority of your customers treat you like crap. I will continue to eat cold fries and remove tomato slices and defend you when you slip up. But I may just lose my shit the next time you hand me a cup with a giant pool of soda sloshing around in the top of the lid. Think of the children, for God's sake.

Love,
velocibadgergirl


Also, for fun:

The internet is awesome: video edition

(There's a whole series of these Flippycat domino videos on YouTube, and they are AWESOME.)

We Heart Mike Rowe

I'm a big Dirty Jobs fan, so we watched a few episodes on the Discovery Channel last night. Mike Rowe also narrates a show that I'll always stop for when channel surfing, Deadliest Catch, and some episodes of my Wednesday night must-see, Ghost Hunters. Because, clearly, TV is no fun unless it's scaring the pants off me or totally grossing me out.

Anyhow, this morning, MB told me that he had a weird dream last night after watching Dirty Jobs. He and BoMB and Mr Muskrat* invited Mike Rowe to go camping with them, but they made sure it was the "ultimate Kentucky camping trip," so there was a mudpit. When they got back to camp and announced it was dinner time and then busted out their traditional camp meal of giant steaks, Mike Rowe was all, "This is my kind of camping."

I have to tell you, I think going on a camping trip with Mike Rowe would be pretty damn awesome, if he didn't get everyone killed.



If you haven't seen Dirty Jobs, you're seriously missing out. Apparently the Discovery Channel website streams full episodes here. They also stream two of my other favorite shows, Mythbusters and What Not to Wear.

*BoMB = Brother of MB, Mr Muskrat = coworker and camping buddy of MB



Reading:  Little (Grrl) Lost by Charles de Lint

Playing:  Cowboy Junkies on shuffle (great rainy-day music)

I Heart the Mythbusters

Reading:  Making Money by Terry Pratchett

Playing:  Icky Thump by the White Stripes (sound warning)

Hope

I stole this from Cadiz because I love it. I hope she doesn't mind!

Sometimes the vegetarians win.

This is long, but it's worth it to watch the whole thing:

This may be the weirdest effing thing I've ever seen:

These are 1,500 prisoners from the Cebu Provincial Detention and Rehabilitation Center in Cebu, Philippines practicing Michael Jackson's "Thriller."

Snitched from here, via Jenn.


And it reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from 13 Going on 30. (Go ahead and laugh all you want, but I have the biggest dorkiest girlcrush on Jennifer Garner, so I'm not ashamed):

You're in the demon produce aisle!

Here's my favorite episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, plus one of my favorite jokes:

So one night, this vampire bat comes straggling back to the cave, really really late. He's covered in blood, and all the other bats surround him in a frenzy, demanding to know where he found it.

He says, "I don't want to talk about it."

They keep harassing him, and he just keeps saying "I don't want to talk about it."

Finally he realizes they won't be dissuaded, so he says, "OK, fine, you want to know where I got this blood?"

All the other bats are screaming "YES GOD YES!!" so he says, "All right, follow me."

He leads the other bats through the forest, for miles and miles, and all the while they're getting more and more excited.

He finally stops, and the other bats all shriek, "The blood! Where is the blood?!"

The first bat says, "OK, you guys see that really big oak tree right over there?"

"Yes! Yes!" the bats howl.

"Good," the bloody bat says. "Because I fucking didn't."

The most determined tortoise ever born:

The All-Request Lunch Hour

Since I don't know what kind of internet access (if any) I'll have while I'm in California at the end of May, I'm planning to write some posts ahead of time, save them as drafts, and enlist MB to upload them for me while I'm gone. To this end, I am now accepting requests for post topics...is there a story you want to hear, a question you're just dying for me to answer, a meme you feel like tagging me for, a topic you want me to ramble on about? Speak now or forever hold your peace, or something. Leave me a comment or drop me an email (velocibadgergirl at gmail dot com), and I'll do what I can to oblige you.


I had an absolutely fantastic weekend, but I'm so completely whipped that I'm having trouble coming up with anything remotely coherent to say about it. Rather than ruin the stories, I'll just wait until I've had a good night's sleep and try again tomorrow.



Happy Birthday, Danger!

I hope it was a great one.



Happy Earth Day, also.

"If we learn, finally, that what we need to 'manage' is not the land so much as ourselves in the land, we will have turned the history of American land-use on its head." -- Gaylord Nelson, Founder of Earth Day

"I recognize the right and duty of this generation to develop and use our natural resources, but I do not recognize the right to waste them, or to rob by wasteful use, the generations that come after us." -- Theodore Roosevelt, speech, Washington, D.C., 1900

Finally

Here are some videos that make me laugh like a hyena:

The Reduced Shakespeare Company's Othello Rap



and Macbeth (with authentic accents)




Reading: Trickster's Choice by Tamora Pierce

Playing: We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank by Modest Mouse, Back to Black by Amy Winehouse, Begin to Hope by Regina Spektor (sound warnings)